July 28, 2026

Hats Off to Soccer!

As I watched the final soccer game FIFA, I couldn’t help but notice that all the players had healthy, full, downright exuberant heads of hair. In spite of ethnic background, age, country of origin or world wide status, it seems that every soccer player has plenty of hair.

Unlike our major league baseball players who, sadly, are balding in some stage or another, either getting a tell tale spot on the back of their heads, or that receding forehead that is slowly making its way to the whole head, or the shave it all off maneuver since it’s a losing battle.

And the logical conclusion? The HAT. Soccer players don’t wear one, baseball players wear them constantly, even during off season while at preseason camp in Arizona or Florida or wherever.. Who knows, they may even wear them at home!

I’m guessing that MLB has a rule that they have to wear a cap or batting helmet during a game, but how about taking them off when you’re not playing? Give your hair roots a break. We all know that air, water and sunlight helps things grow.

I suspect there’s plenty of room for doctoral level research here. Do outfielders lose hair more rapidly than shortstops? Does the color of your hat dictate the amount of hair loss? How about the material? Maybe hats of silk or mesh might be helpful. Will anyone be innovative enough to invent a baseball cap that lets in the sun rays? Or allows the fresh air to circulate around the scalp?

For heaven’s sake. Somebody step up and save a generation of otherwise handsome young men from inevitable baldness. Either that or let’s encourage professional soccer to takeover as our national pastime. Oh, right.